This is somewhat different from my other two stamps that talk about actual issues in the world. I’ve just seen too many people throw this word around, and I am truly tired of seeing people pull out the “that’s bullying” card. So, I’ve decided to make this stamp to rant and voice my opinion.
Some Edits: - Pause added. I keep on forgetting that I really should have that pause. - Added a little bit of info.
More Edits: - After pondering for a bit, I may as well clarify a few things that may get some future commentators confused or have confused others.
1) No, I do not support rude, nasty, or harassment at all; whether off or on the internet. I actually find it sad that many people out there utilize the internet as a way to act rude, selfish, and overall nasty because "hay, it's anonymous" and I do not support harassing a user either.
2) I know that a critique does not equal a negative comment (negative comment in this case being such posts along the lines of "this is shitty"). The point of this stamp is addressing a number of users out there (whether on DA or other sites) who get into a tizzy because someone gave them a critique, and then began to get upset over it. Just as how they get upset over meaningless comments like "this is crap" and start to get upset to the point of decrying "cyber bully!" over nothing.
3) This hasn't been an issue for me yet, but I should clarify now that I know there are cases of people who are harassed on the internet to the point of suicide/harming themselves/etc and I know that it does not help when you go somewhere and every post you receive is just anger-filled and violent, especially when you did absolutely nothing wrong.
To note quickly though; this stamp is technically about no-nothing conflicts brought up via a dumb comment or a critique. Not actual cases of someone with an account, minding their own business and then suddenly being harassed without reason.
However, I will address one thing here. When it comes to cases of, for example: A user who has done nothing wrong is now being harassed by another user they do not know; for me, it is hard to look at every single incidence of harassment and agree that it's "cyber bullying" when, at the same time, said user could simply remove themselves from the internet and get a way from such things. When I was bullied in Elementary School, I could not go to my parents and ask "can we move/transfer me to another school" because that is both costly and difficult. If I had a load of users harassing me on my account; I can block them, ignore them, make a new account, or just stop going onto the internet if it is such an issue.
At the same time, if someone is too "delicate" for the internet than maybe they should not go on it or, at the least, not make an account/enter arguments/debates/etc because the more you put yourself out there on the internet, the more likely you are to come upon some person who, out of their spare time, will irritate you (this can be true of reality as well; the more you're known, the more likely it is that someone out there who has heard of you may hate you). Either they will need to pull back from the internet if they're too sensitive, or simply grow a thicker skin because the world cannot cater to someone whose "sensitive" and "emotional".
However, and I will clarify it again, I do not support aimlessly harassing another for no reason (or for very pointless reasons). I do sympathize with people who are harassed on their accounts (keep in mind, those who have done nothing and are being bothered; I hold no sympathy for the users who brought it upon themselves) and cannot get it to stop. It is irritating and yes, I do understand that it must be emotionally exhausting to log in and see messages like "fuck you die" or "you suck" in your message box over, and over, and over.
I just think people need to look more into cases of harassment over the internet before they start to throw around the word "cyber bully", because to me these things seem easier to avoid than it is to avoid bullying off the internet.
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It can drive me up the wall at times when users, specifically overly emotional ones, throw around the term “cyber bullying” or just “bullying” when being insulted/bothered/annoyed by someone over the internet.
From what I was taught, the definition of "cyber bullying" goes along the lines of this:
""Let’s say there are two girls; Suzy and Jenny. Jenny has come to hate Suzy because, apparently, she heard Suzy has a small crush on Jenny’s boyfriend and has this absurd idea that Suzy may try to steal him from her. So, she decides to go onto the internet and make a hate account for Suzy of Facebook and uses it to make up lies about her being a "slut", "stealing boyfriends" and allowing others to post their own hateful comments. Then, to spread it around, she links it to her friends, who link it to their friends and over time send it around the school (and possibly then some). After let’s say a month, everyone starts to think that Suzy is a "slut" who will steal any guy from any girl, and start to treat her cruelly at school. And not only that, let’s say Jenny also linked Suzy’s email and Facebook account to everyone along with the hate account, thus allowing people from her very school to send hateful emails to her and harass her at home, giving Suzy little to no break from being bullied.""
Through using the internet and technology, Jenny has been able to not only ruin Suzy’s reputation at school through a method by which is quick and allows her the ability to be "anonymous", but has also salted the wound, metaphorically speaking, by making it so that even at home people can send hateful and cruel emails to her.
However, when I see people use the world "Cyber bully" it tends to be used in this context:
""Emotionaluser22 and Meaniecommentator3 are two users who do not know each other. Meaniecommentator3 comes upon Emotionaluser22’s account, sees their art and finds it of low quality. Thus, they comment on some of the pieces about how they "suck pieces of donkey shit" (in Meaniecommentator3's own words). Emotionaluser22, getting upset sends replies like "Ur a meanie, stop bulling me!!1!” while Meaniecommentator3 laughs it off and bugs Emotionaluser22 some more thanks to how Emotionaluser22 reacts to all of Meaniecommentator3's comments.""
To clarify some things; Emotionaluser22 lives in B.C., Canada and Meaniecommentator3 lives in Newfoundland, Canada. They have never met before nor will meet, and both have average lives outside of their "internet lives".
To me, the second scenario is not cyber bullying:
Has this person been truly hurt? Are they going to school being beaten up, gossiped behind their back and otherwise having their social life ruined because of an unknown person’s random comment on their art posted on the internet? Chances are, no, it will not. Someone commenting on an account (perhaps multiple times), leaving rude posts and having no physical interaction with you does not, to me, constitute as cyberbullying because the solution is quite simple. Ignore the user, block them, or get away from the internet.
And if somehow that user has allowed their internet conflict to impact their daily life to the point of actual bullying at school/work/etc, I have to say it comes down to being their fault for allowing it to happen. There is no possible way people at school would know about the internet drama, less they either 1) make a deal about it to the point of obtaining negative attention at school or 2) allowed themselves to be easy found on the internet to the point where they may as well be advertising themselves. In both cases, these can be avoided with sensible behavior and decisions.
And for those of you who try to defend these people by saying “Oh, but [insert user] is really sensitive, has a hard life and shouldn’t deal with this”, how should anyone be able to figure this out upon first looking at them? This is not forgetting, of course, that if they really are that sensitive, that easily emotional at the littlest of mean comments, then why are they on a site where anyone can type anything, even comments that might offend them? If they really get emotional over comments, they should not be here (or take better precautions to staying unknown). And if they really want to be here, they should get a backbone then, especially if they also want attention/fans/etc.
Plus, if said emotional user did something such as freaking out at a minor critique or petty comment; than they kind of deserve whatever problems comes their way. Why should they be treated any differently from someone else; because they’re a little more “sensitive” and have a “hard life”? Everyone at some point has hard a hard life, their problems do not make them transcend equal treatment. There are a lot worse things out there than a random person commenting on why your art “sux” or hell, even just critiquing your art. If you truly, really don’t want to deal with a critique; a simple answer is to ignore it. It’s not as if someone is holding a gun to your head, demanding you get better. And if they continue, or bug you, just say you draw for fun and is really not up for it; but thanks anyways. That. Simple.
Oh, but that’s not what they want. They want nothing but positive, 100% you are a perfect artist comments. Because god forbid they deal with reality and understand that they need to deal with good and bad things, or let alone try to get better at their art. Because someone suggesting “hay, draw the head smaller or make the neck thicker” apparently translates to “blah blah blah you’re a shitty artist blah blah blah I’m an asshole blah blah blah apparently I’m bullying you”.
Long rant short; stop throwing the word “Cyber Bullying” or just plain “Bullying” around for petty reasons like “AH!! This person critiqued/left a negative comment/talked badly/made parody art about my work! BAWWWW! DAT’S CYBER BULLING!!11!”. Internet drama is practically a paper cut compared to some of the conflicts out there outside of the internet. Especially in real cases of bullying and cyber bullying.
And if you really, really, really don’t want any critique/negative comments on your art;
Critique shouldn't be consider "cyber-bullying" I think.. But "critique" has been abused these days..
Rather than finding flaws that lacks purpose, I see some people attack the purpose/styles just because some people hate it - Bias. Forcing "sucks" whether a work has many real flaws or not isn't something good either, nor is "forced critique" I think. But a honest, real, legit (Non bias) critique probably shouldn't exactly be consider cyber bullying.
Also, "BAW" is getting really annoying and doesn't seem to serve any argument, but alas I probably know where that term came from..
Huzzah, someone who knows the difference between 'bullying' and criticism! Seriously... It gets on my nerves when people say you're bullying them because you happen to have expressed a negative view on something.
bright-and-happyFeatured By OwnerAug 8, 2013Hobbyist Artist
I hate when I say one little thing and then the person gets angry at me and I'm just like "FUCK THIS." I almost flipped my laptop once I was so pissed off. People just always need to the the victim just for attention.
Also, harrassment isn't saved just for real life situations. Even if your "personal real life" isn't affected, you're still emotionally affected by what people say and do online. Just because it's online doesn't mean it's any less hurtful to some people. Growing a backbone shouldn't be a tip for these people. Some people have it MUCH harder trying to ignore things like that, like myself for example. You can't just expect someone with troubles in 'getting over shit' to actually do so easily.
First of all, yes I do agree multiple comments to a user degrading them for no real reason other than shits 'n giggles is wrong and can be frustrating, and yes that is harassment.
But this stamp is not talking about what is harassment and what isn't. If you read my author's comments, you'd see that I used the word "harassment" often and agreed that multiple users posting to you for no good reason other than to upset you is harassment. It's "CYBER BULLYING" I'm talking about here, addressing people who use that word to define a bunch of people you don't know harassing you. Is it right that they harass you? No, of course not! Does it hurt? Of course, it's not fun to be told you suck. Is it Cyber Bullying, not in my books. Not with what I've seen before.
Some user you don't know calling you "shit-head" constantly; it's stupid, annoying, frustrating, and certainly harassment; but not bullying if you can ignore, block, and do a number of things that can help you easily avoid the user.
Someone takes a photo of you, photoshop it onto a cow, and then send it to other friends at school via email to be passed around so everyone look at you and calls you "fat cow", that is a bully using the internet to hurt others.
And yes, if you are someone who find it "MUCH harder trying to ignore things like that", then you learn to ignore it. Do you really think these people will stop if you continue to reply and refuse to ignore it? These are people who adore seeing the reactions to their nasty comments, it's why they're called "Trolls". Listen, I get that it can be tough and that it hurts to get cruel, unnecessary comments often. But the internet can be real nasty and because we have so much Anonymity there will always be people who will use the internet for no good reason, other than to be cruel because they know there is no real life consequences.
In the end, I'm not saying that you can't feel upset, it's fine if you feel down when someone pointlessly bugs you, heck I get peeved if someone goes about to call me stupid, or a liar, etc. But letting yourself become easily goaded on, especially with petty comments, and then let comments like "u sux" hurt you, well then your time on the internet won't be a fun one at times.
Oh, I know that. I've been trying to ignore this stuff for about two years now. There's hate blogs on Tumblr about me, there's many people who make fun of my art and my characters on DeviantArt, etc. And plenty of art thieves and stuff. But yeah. I'm a lot better now than I used to be about dealing with it (or in this case NOT dealing with it and trying hard to ignore it), but deep down it still hurts when I come across a nasty comment or a tumblr post and it's really aggrivating still when I see people using my art and characters on sites like that pathetic hellhole, Worlize.
You're right though. I do need to try harder--which I've been doing--not to let them get to me so much. Again, I'm much better now than I was when it first started (Tumblr hate comments, a Livestream invasion of about 30+ trolls bitching me out and stuff, etc.). I was depressed, crying every night, and even contemplated suicide for a day or two. I knew how pathetic and silly that was, but the idea of it was still in the back of my mind. I was scared, hurt, and completely new to this kind of thing. I've been bullied "in real life" many times before, so you'd think I'd be used to or at least expectant of it online, but I guess not back then. XD